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Friday, January 28, 2005
well, today i think can be counted as a happy day ba? actaully yesterday is great too. but today is better for me lah. well, hmmm, class ppl is more hyper these 2 days, especially yesterday, really cool, and great to see everyone having fun n energetic again, coz seem like v long since everyone gather togetheer n get crazy. haha, but things die down when everyone started going home. hmm, dunnoe lei, shld everyone stay late wat, haha, but then again, everything no matter how gd will have its ending mah. well, hmmm, i count this 2 days as happy days coz of a few reasons. here is a few points, not avvording to importance or anything ah, haha, just watever comes to my mind. so firstly, tok abt friends ba. hmm, i tok to hz more nowadays? today more, haha, i think its gd coz we hardly tok these days lah. thou i somehow feel that he is still supressing sumthing but, well, something is better than nothing. i dun wan to just lose a friend like that. maybe certain things i dun understand now, but i feel that hz sorta understand me in certain things n vice versa. maybe only now we dun understand more ba? like some advice i hear, its coz i dun say it out, so ppl cant understand. true lah, but nowadays, i have this habit of keeping things to myself. more n more. just feel that it doesn't matter if i tell ppl or not. i tell becoz i want to, not becoz i wan to explain myself. i cant be bothered to explian myself coz no one is me, they dun noe wat i am thinking, wat i am feeling. i always feel that i have a more diff thinking than other ppl n i think, its true, just that i dun really show it that much. sometimes. i feel maybe i dun belong here but well, everyone's got their ups and downs. like me, blanking out on jap quizz today. -_-" i feel sad for myself, the test is not that difficult loh. -_-" i'm really tired now, wanna crush soon, but just had dinner, so i cant sleep. back to the topic of my happy day, besides friends, classmate also seem to tok more. think coz IAP 4 leaving for attachment n when they come back, we r gonna graduate. will miss em. will miss avid. gotta move to blk M soon. dun wan. mr james lied, say few weeks!!! its wedesday? so...so..dun wan...haha. really, its like such a close place to us now. like our second home, our private space. isolated from other design students, specialisation but that was a room just for us. n ben (rumoured roomie) n the two computer rooms, just for senoirs. i dun wan the junoirs to even go in as they like. its ours for now. but well, they wun even get to have their room next time. tsk tsk tsk. avid is really our second home loh. hai~ next time, no sofa, no nothing le. just like a normal lab. sian lah.. another thing is, my life is more on the track now too? i think. hmmm, saf n me are getting along well, after that din-tok-the-whole-day day, we r closer. he is a really sweetans sensitive guy, think just misunderstand by ppl sometimes. i guess its always best to tok things out? hmmm, dennis told me not to bother abt wat ppl think, i keep that in my mind. i dun. at first i do mind alittle but now i dun really care. i mean, not dun care, but ppl can gossip or tok watever they wan. coz in the end, few yrs later, they mite not even noe who i am. ppl r like that, they tok abt ppl easily, maybe cozing permanent scars to ppl but they dun even care or realise, all that just coz they needed a topic to tok abt, to spread abt. well, alot of ppl is like that so, ha, i'm not gonna explain myself to anyone. only ppl i want to. thou i haven fully accomplise that. so far, only dennis, saf n vic noes more. its hard to open up to other ppl coz i noe they already have perceptions in their mind so its harder. well one day, maybe i'll tell em when i want to, maybe they will understand when they want to, maybe. dennis had been really supportive. i tk my hats off him, he is really really a v great guy. i wun mind introducing to victoria. they are both such gd ppl, will make a great couple. but thats my own point of view. haha. wat nonsense. well, just wan ppl ard me to be happy. if i can, i wanna tk away the pain i inflicted on dennis. he dun deserve all the pain he is going thru. i dun regret the decisions i make, coz i noe everything happens for a reason. i sincerely hope someone will soon be send to him to share his pain n joy. he deserve it. despite his own pain, he still think for me. maybe now i cant open up to u, but, i noe everything will go better over time. we r not together anymore but u r of importance in my life too, thanks for being there n listening to my problems. one day, we will be able to really, really be like greatest friends. not friends, higher than that, but u noe wat i mean rite? haha. well, i'm contented just with ppl living in harmony. i miss it that now just everything being peaceful makes me happy. i wan it to get better but u noe, i'm happy with the way things are. its not exactly there yet, changes needs time to adapt. i'm sure one day, i'll be able to balance everything again. now i'm still abit blur but, its not a bad start. i'm so sleepy, eyes shutting le...gotta sleep. willl tok more tmlo then. nite nite rose |
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Cookiesâ„Life " Just living isn't enough", said the butterfly, "one must also have freedom, sunshine, and a little flower." - Hans Christian Anderson " December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 April 2006 June 2006 July 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 April 2008 July 2008 September 2008 October 2008 February 2009 April 2009 August 2009 September 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 April 2010 July 2010 January 2011 Designer : Chili. x o x o |